A few months ago I was approached by Marcy of Fearlessly Just Me about an idea that she had. She wanted to put together a lookbook that featured women size 22+ to both give space to bloggers on the upper end of the plus size size spectrum as well as show how stylish women size 22+ can be, even with less options than our smaller plus size friends.

Marcy summed up this project and her idea well this morning on her FB page: “I am a firm believer that there is no dream too big or crazy AND it is so important to create opportunities for yourself and others. You should never wait to be seen — you should make it possible to be seen. With that said, this project I have been working on with 11 other amazing women is proof of those two key things and I am so happy to finally announce that it is live. I think there should be more diversity shown in the media and campaigns. Too often, us women a size 24 and up get ignored because we’re visibly plus and sometimes people think it’s negative to show larger bodies. Well, this lookbook is proof that style doesn’t stop at a size 22 and that body diversity is a great thing. All bodies are beautiful and everyone is worthy and deserving of fashion. Please check it out! Special thanks to all the babes in this lookbook from so many corners of the world. Together, we are a force to be reckoned with in this Big Girl Revolution.”

I knew I wanted to be involved right away. While the project was a lookbook, Marcy made sure to stress that she wanted to introduce us as people. I though through what my favorite clothes were and how I saw myself, so I tried to choose looks that exemplified how I see myself. My lovely sister-in-law Brittany helped these looks come alive through her photography — thank you!

I’ve shared most of these looks before here on my blog, but there was one I kept until the lookbook was live. It is a simple enough outfit: a white top from xWhoWhatWear at Target, jeans from Evans, and a purse from Aldo, but it was also a look that broke a lot of rules I have placed on myself in the past: no defined waist, slight turtle neck that touches my double chin, and even just posing without a smile. I’m not a model, and posing with a serious expression is something that ends up forcing me into a critique-spiral. These photos made me feel beautiful though.

Check out the full lookbook with the other 11 participating bloggers below

A couple weeks ago I reached out on Instagram and Facebook to seek out your advice on how to style Eloquii’s (now sold out) fit and flare dress. You all gave me multiple suggestions on how to go about it, and the challenge I made to myself was to not spend any additional money on the look. While I got a lot of suggestions, from wearing it with a scarf and moto jacket to “Russian winter theme”, I started with the following suggestions:

Now I don’t own a pea coat currently, but I had the booties. My immediate thought was to wear it with this oversized chain necklace I owned, but I felt like it was a style or look I had done in the past, so I started playing with some of the jewelry I have. I was originally going for a shorter necklace, but then just put on the long one to see how I liked it. Then I added in a different chain necklace and found that I really liked the layered look. This is actually the first time I’ve worn layered necklaces. Living on the edge, y’all!

I also just finished watching Good Girls Revolt on Amazon Prime, so I went with straight hair with a braid along the front.

I added in the long coat I had from Target. It has a close feel to a peacoat without the distinct button pattern you’d expect.

I really loved dressing with your vision. It pushed me to try something new, and I think it wasn’t as safe as maybe my first reach would have been when I went to wear the dress. Thanks Eloquii, Sally, and Sarina in helping me style this look!

Dress – Eloquii, Boots – Evans, Coat – Target, Long Necklace – Charming Charlie, Short Necklace – UrbanOutfitters

You’ll have to let me know if you like offering styling. I’d love to do a post like this one every month or two since it helps me get out of my rut of typical styling choices.

Hi everyone! I hope those of you that celebrate had a great Thanksgiving Day. I put together a short video about my day that I hope you will check out (especially the end!!) I also included some images of what I wore, also posted below:

Dress/Tunic: Additionelle.com, Leggings: Catherines, Boots: Evans, Earrings: White Owl (similar)

Hey everyone! It’s been awhile since I posted last. After Thanksgiving, we had just a few weeks to end the semester. I was indeed wearing clothes during this time, and if you follow me on instagram, then you probably saw some of my lovely bathroom selfies of outfits. It’s come to that sad point in the year when the bathroom at my workplace has better lighting than I can get at home, but when it’s dark before I even arrive home after work, taking outfit pictures is just impossible. But have no fear! I managed to put a few outfits together as I and my students made a mad dash to the end of the semester.

During those whirlwind weeks of meeting with students, grading, giving feedback, etc., I found that wearing pants/jeans seemed like a punishment in and of itself. Luckily, leggings + tunic/dress is a back up uniform I can call to at any moment, and I wore various versions of this over and over again.

First up was this overcast-gray zippered tunic from Evans, black jeggings from Torrid, and old booties from Evans. I’ve always loved the length of Evans’ tunics, and I used to shop with Evans a lot (and even collaborated with them back in the day), but they seem to offer less tunics or at least less tunic styles that I like then they did back in the day. That said, this was a goodie, and I love the small zipper details. This is a warm tunic. Do not let the shorter sleeves fool you. The material keeps in the heat, which is good on a cold day but bad in a heated office. You’ve been warned — choose where you wear this carefully! I didn’t do much to it since I hurried out the door, but there are lots of different options with scarves, jewelry, and jackets in kicking it up a notch.

In the search for all my different options to wear with leggings, I unearthed this dress from, I believe, SimplyBe, that I probably bought back in 2012 or 2013. This is one of those dresses that I planned to wear many times and then never actually did. For some reason whatever was holding me back before didn’t stop me now. This dress has fluffy sleeves, feather print, and a matching belt. Again, the outfit is a bit no-fuss since I was heading into work, but a leather jacket or playing around with belts could also make this more interesting if I wear it again in the future.

One of the last events I attended as part of the semester was my program’s end of term potluck. I decided to take a little more time to get ready and to look festive, so I pulled this tunic/dress from Evans that is a green/blue (more green that it appears here), my new studded boots from Lane Bryant, and I *gasp* put on jewelry for work. I topped the look with a silver chain bracelet and silver earrings from, I think, Forever21 (similar earrings here).

I really like this dress, its texture and color, but holy-static-cling. I didn’t realize it was going to be such an issue and was unprepared to deal with it making its way north while walking across campus. Later I used a dryer sheet to neutralize it before heading out with friends, but I think I’ll have to invest in anti-static-cling spray before wearing it out again.

Grades were due yesterday, and I received my course evaluations this morning. I’m now officially allowing myself to not think about work for the next week. So far my break plans include decluttering and organizing my apartment (a continuation of a project started months ago), going to the movies, seeing family and friends as much as possible, and enjoying sleeping in with Lola. Tomorrow I’m heading in to Charlotte to explore some places that I don’t usually get to during my work week, so follow along on Instagram or Snapchat if you’d like to connect more day-to-day.

This morning I laid in bed with the covers up to my chin, cuddled with Lola, and argued back and forth with myself about whether or not I’d venture out to Charlotte to visit my office. I had left some books there that I wanted to re-read while I planned for the next semester, and offices would close the next day until January. But it was cold. My phone let me know that it was only 29*F, and I tried to think of a million excuses to push it to tomorrow, but all I could come to were a million consequences from putting things off for one more day. The only reason I pried myself out of the bed was the thought that I could wear my new booties from Lane Bryant. Yes. Yes. That shallow of a reason. I wanted to wear booties. Welcome to my life.

This outfit started with the booties. I typically only wear black shoes. I don’t know why (oh, right, I’m boring). But these low ankle booties intrigued me from the moment I saw them. I liked the buckle, the low heel, and the color, and when I got them they were comfortable (and still a bit stiff). It was a win! But I didn’t know how to wear them. I’m so, so used to black boots. I asked my friends Rachel and Jen, and they immediately said with jeans rolled up. Well I don’t follow directions well, but I still wore them with extra-short jeggings, and I went with a cream colored sweater that I hadn’t worn out yet, also from Lane Bryant.

With the outfit itself having a calm color palette and intricate texture, I wanted warmer accessories and make up, so I reached for this bordeaux deep purple/red Aldo bag and Pixi lipstick in Rose Naturelle

I also added brown and gold floral earrings that gave just a little shine to the look.

By the way – update on the cold – it ended up warming to above 60*F by mid-afternoon. I was cozied up and worried I would regret it, but these short sleeves saved me. Thanks, North Carolina weather. I made it to my office and grabbed my books. I even stopped for a delicious coffee and creme brulee before heading back home. Getting out of bed ended up being totally worth it, so thanks LB booties for motivating me forward.

Sweater: Lane Bryant (similar), Jeggings: Torrid, Booties: Lane Bryant, Handbag: Aldo, Earrings: Forever21

When I finished graduate school in 2012, I realized that I hadn’t read anything for the joy of reading in about 4-5 years. Yikes, school reading had taken over my life. I wanted to start reading more, but I was reading so much every day as part of my job that I found myself falling asleep every time I cracked open a book. Enter Audible to the rescue. I signed up for a monthly subscription ($14 a month for 1 book token), and I started reading during my commutes to work. At first I kept it to the car, but now I listen to audiobooks while I cook, clean, and sit in bed playing the “Mexican Train” game on my phone before falling asleep. I started in 2013 with 11 titles in my Audible library. Now I have 95!  I’ve spent some serious time getting back into books, and I love it. I still won’t crack open a book, but I will definitely press play, and I’ve even added podcasts to my weekly listening.

Below is a list of all the books I read through Audible during 2016 (with the exception of some I started but never finished). I also included three podcasts that I listened to throughout the year. If you click on the image, a gallery will appear with some notes about each piece, so if you want to hear my thoughts on each, just click through the gallery below.

What books and/or podcasts have you enjoyed this year that I should add to my list?

Any thoughts about the ones I’ve included?

When SimplyBe recently reached out to me and offered the chance to try some of their new items, I jumped at the chance. It had been a year or so since I had gotten an item from SimplyBe, but they were always in my dream-wardrobe building website visits, especially since they care so many different brands with signature styles. As I looked to pick out items, my eye kept going to dresses, dresses, and more dresses. So it was decided, I was going to dress up with SimplyBe :).

My first choice was this print wrap dress. I was drawn to the colors, the flowy bell sleeve, and the potential to wear with tights (a must as we approach winter). The dress did have stitching to make the v-neck have a higher gathering. It cause a little gapping on me, so I took out the stitching and added an under tank.

The dress is faux-wrapped at the waist. It was a little loose and didn’t have much elastic, so I went with a belt, which I think added to the look anyway. I added a pink floral earring to finish off the look.

The second dress I went for was a blue Joanna Hope wrap dress (I must have also been feeling wrap dresses that day). This one is also a faux-wrap, as it really is just a knot off to the side. This dress is perfect for a date night, going to a play, or wearing to work. It is super comfortable and no-fuss, but looks dressy.

As I write this post, I’m already eyeing some other dress styles, available sizes 8-28. Check out my new favorites here and here.

Let me know what you think of these styles and if there are any others I should check out!

Thank you to SimplyBe for these gifted items.

Hi everyone! Long time, no posts, right?! I’ve moved on over to YouTube, and I hope you will join me there. Check out my review of the Girl With Curves x Lane Bryant line here! Please like & subscribe to see all new content.

Hi everyone,

Long time no see! I’m still over on YouTube making regular videos — at least two a week! I hope you will join me there or follow on Instagram.

That said, I’m here to share a cute top from SimplyBe! This western denim top was gifted to me from SimplyBe’s team as part of a multi-influencer styling collab. I know Hailey of Discourse of a Divine Diva posted her look today, so check hers out too!

I’m wearing the SimplyBe top in a size 28. When I first thought about styling it, I knew I wanted to do some kind of tied waist. I’ve been a little obsessed with that look. My first inclination was to go denim on denim and pair this top with a lighter color jean bottom, but then I knew that accessories would have to bring the outfit to life. That made me change direction and go with a different texture. I paired it with a ribbed knit pencil skirt by Leith in a 4X, faux leather booties by Old Navy, and this felt hat from Torrid. I loved the mix of textures and felt that this choice brought much more depth to the look.

This top is so versatile, and I can’t wait to see how everyone else styled it! Let me know in the comments how you would wear it!

Hey everyone! Today’s video is a little different because I’m reviewing a home item. I am so, so, so excited that I get to work with Big Fig Mattress and bring you this review. I’ve known about Big Fig for years, and I got to meet their team when I went to Atlanta for the TCF Expo.

I contacted them to see if they wanted to work together because I was so interested in their product. I was gifted the mattress, foundation, and frame for the purpose of a review. I was not paid to make a video. All opinions are my own.

Big Fig is a mattress specifically made for a bigger figure. It holds more weight and has better materials for heavier people. They recently launched a quicker shipping method by providing their mattress in a box, so I tested this out and put together the bed myself. I hope you enjoy the video — It’s very thorough!

I am now an affiliate of Big Fig and have my own discount code. I do earn a small commission on sales through my link.

You can shop Big Fig here. Coupon code: REBECCA – good for at least $100 off, but currently good for $300 off!

Please let me know if you have any questions!

Y’all. I’ve been talking to myself for over 10 years in some way, some where on the internet. I went from routinely blogging, to posting on Instagram, to making videos on YouTube, and then returning mostly to the short form content of Instagram. It’s interesting to see my presence, my energy, and my history ebb and flow in these spaces as I move to make the kind of content I like to consume. Media, in all its forms, gives different opportunities for expression, but it also can change over time how you explore your thoughts and share them with others.

When I wrote my blog, I was curious, cautious, dipping my toe into saying hello. On YouTube, I can be silly, serious, and story tell with my voice, which is a strength I’ve honed through teaching. Instagram gets the little bits, like I’m putting some seasoning out there. Just the highlights, just the unattached thoughts.

I’ve missed having a place to explore, to write. I’m 35 now. I started this website when I was 22! The archives are there, and I might revisit some old posts from my current perspective. Some things have stayed the same. I still have my Lola girl. She’s 13 now. I’m still single (there have been some situationships along the way). I’m still exploring who I am.

Other things feel so far away from who I am now. I don’t remember a life where I wasn’t responsible for rent, car payments, and all the burdens of adult independence. I have so much more access to clothes now. I have an in-person fat community to turn to, so I’m less dependent on my online connections.

I’m excited to share who I am now on this site, what I’m curious about, what I’m facing. You’ll have to let me know what you like to see here. I’ll be bringing over some of the things I share elsewhere but writing through the ideas more. I’m excited to return to my first homeplace: theplussideofme.com.

One of the companies I’ve been lucky to work with is Rebdolls, a size-inclusive brand that spans sizes 0-32. There are only a few brands that come out with their own designs in this many sizes, so I’ve always been impressed by the brand’s founder and CEO Grisel Paula, who was introduced to the plus-size market through her modeling. *All links are affiliate links, and I earn a small commission from purchases made through my links.

Over the years I’ve seen this brand move from their basics, which they still offer, to exciting, trendy designs for a wide range of consumers. They sent me 6 styles from their holiday collection to review and share, so here are these beauts for you to view. An additional perk? Everything is 40% off on their site right now!

1. Colette Abstract Print Adjustable Ruched Midi Bodycon Dress, size 18/20

The Colette dress was one of my favorite pieces they sent me. Perhaps it is because this piece can work in any season, but it’s also how silky the fabric is, the different shapes you can create with the ruching on the side, and the gorgeous colors in the print. The fit was phenomenal on this piece, but it is slightly less than giving in the hips for me, so if you are more pear shaped, I recommend sizing up or looking for. apiece with more stretch.

2. Makena Satin Pleated Asymmetrical Midi Bodycon Dress, size 18/20

The Makena dress is so classy and beautiful! Again, such a silky material. Some comments I received over on YouTube and IG were that people didn’t care for the side window because they wanted to wear shapewear. You can close up that window to be about the size of a quarter, so I think either black or skin-color shapewear would be perfectly fine if you wanted to wear that with this style. This cut is pretty flowy from the midriff down, so I recommend sizing to your upper body. My favorite part is the big bow at the front. LOVE!

3. Aries Rising Popcorn Smocking Cap Sleeve Maxi Bodycon Dress, size 18/20

I’ve been told that red is my color, and I have to agree here! The popcorn material is unique and comfy with lots of stretch. I love the strong shoulder and the long bodycon maxi skirt. I felt super sexy in the Aries dress, and now I need to figure out an event for me to wear this to! While this dress has stretch, it is bodycon and will pullback to whatever shape you are. If you want a looser fit, size up once.

4. Chiara Sequin Fringe Midi Slip Dress, size 18/20

The Chiara dress is perfect for a holiday party. Like I will be keeping this piece for New Years Eve, and I will need to cheers with champagne right at midnight. The sequins lay nicely, and I love that they extend down on the fringe hem. The cut of this dress fit me perfectly, and the straps are adjustable. Follow the size chart exactly when ordering this dress. This piece is made for dancing, so cha cha on, y’all.

5. Lena Metallic Wide Leg Cargo Pants, size 18/20

The Lena pants are not my typical style because.. let’s face it.. I’m not that cool, but they were a fun piece to try on, and I love that people size 0-32 have options like this to pick from. They were comfortable to wear and quite long in the leg. I’m only 5’4″, and I imagine they’d work best for someone 5’8″ or taller.

6. Scorpio Popcorn Smocking Cut Out Mini Bodycon Dress, size 18/20

And we have our last dress. I don’t often wear mini dresses, especially without tights, but this dress had me believing that I could show a little thigh and survive to see the next day. Again, we have that popcorn fabric, which is stretchy and soft. The ties at both sides gives you some choices in how you want to shape the piece. The fit is the same as the other dress in this fabric. It is going to show all your curves, so be ready to show up and show out. I’ll be doing exactly that in this dress soon!

I hope you enjoyed this little preview of the holiday collection on me. I have my eye on a few other styles, though, maybe (just maybe) I have enough holiday pieces to keep my money to myself (for now).

This Black Friday I *tried* to keep my focus on getting presents for my loved ones this Christmas (and I did get some awesome toys on sale at Alex’s Toys at the Concord Mills Mall), but I still am a little bit of “one for you, one for me” and snagged myself a few deals as well. Here’s what I got! *Some links provided are affiliate links where I earn a small commission from purchases made via the links.*

1. Universal Standard Farrah High Rise Flared Jeans, normally $128, now $75

I work with Universal Standard regularly to promote their brand (sizes 00-40), and they sent me a pair of the Farrah flare jeans to support their demin drive (happening now with prices starting at $35). I honestly didn’t think flare leg jeans worked for me, but when I tell you that I was feeling myselfffff, oh my! They are a little long for me, so I have to wear my tallest boots (I’m 5’4″). I love the dark style they sent me, but I do wear a good bit of lighter denim, so I picked up this style in two other colors: Pure Blue and Distressed Vintage Blue. I do have a code to get an extra 10% off, and I used the code myself: INFS-BFREBECCA10.

2. Eloquii Striped Turtleneck Sweater Dress, normally $110, now $35

I honestly have not shopped with Eloquii in over a year. When I was a size 30/32, they did not make many styles that came in my size. When I was a size 26/28, I had bought more clothes from them, and I did have some favorite, but the fit never felt right for my body. Their garments tended to be big on me in the shoulders and bust and too tight in the hips, likely because I am more pear shaped. I decided to dip a toe back in and try an item from them to see how they would fit me at my current size and body shape. This dress comes in three color ways, and I loved the green and dark blue version, but they were sold out in my size. This red version is very eye catching, and I’m eager to see how it looks on. If it goes well, perhaps I’ll try more styles from them.

3. Lane Bryant Smart Lift Smooth Unlined Balconette Bra, normally $49, now $25

I go between Lane Bryant and Torrid for my bras, and as my breast shape has changed over time, I’ve recognized that I need to move from plunge styles to balconettes, mostly because the girls like to escape out of the middle with the plunge styles. I used to only wear bra styles with molded cups, and I will say those styles do give more lift and uniform shape because your breasts kind of rest in the bra without any changes to what it looks like on the exterior. I find these styles uncomfortable sometimes and want a softer bra with less support, and this is where the unlined balconette comes in. I purchased this in a skin color version for myself earlier in the fall, so when I saw it was on major sale, I picked up the black version. I really like the texture of the fabric of this bra. It has stretch to it and holds your breasts in a great shape without a harder foam. I give this style an A++.

4. What Lo Wants “Florencia” Maxi Dress in Jaded Floral, normally $69, now$48

What Lo Wants is a small business, plus-size woman owned and designed brand that carries sizes 12 – 30/32. She comes out with small batch styles pretty frequently focused on textiles she often designs herself, so if you like this print but not this style, she has it featured in a couple other styles as well. I had been eyeing the Florencia dress for awhile because it has a lot of design features I love: bodycon maxi, sheer fabric, floral design. I was excited to see they had a 30% off sale, so I snagged this dress and considered some others but I’m really trying not to buy too many things, so I kept myself to this one item.

I saw better sales leading up to Thanksgiving than I did on Black Friday itself, and I anticipate that Cyber Monday might also have better deals. They know we’re shopping on Black Friday, so they don’t have to do as much to get our money that day. If I order any more things this weekend, it will be new sheets for my bed. Oh, the joyous purchases of adulthood :).

Where did you shop during Black Friday? What’s the best deal you scored?

Affiliate Links to all of the items I tried on in my video.

• Deluxe Rib Relaxed Tee Heather Grey
• Deluxe Rib Wide Leg Pants Heather Grey
• Mockneck Sweater Cream
• Jackie High Rise Cropped Jean
• Davis Leather Blazer
• Riviera High Rise Bootcut Jeans
• Corduroy Greenwich Jacket
• Cassidy High Rise Straight Corduroy Pants
• Aspen Rib Danube Skirt
• Aspen Rib Scoop Back Top
• Leeron Leather Moto Jacket
• Ballroom Satin Gown
• Velvety-Cool Jersey Twist Dress
• Misa Dress

“If you don’t know where you are, a map won’t help.”

– Watts Humphrey

I like a set path. A destination to work toward. For the last.. well damn.. 16 years, I have been working forward in my career in education. The path has shifted from time to time, but it’s followed a curved line to my current work of teaching writing and research to university students. I’ve been involved in some type of school without a break since I was in kindergarten. So much of my identity is wrapped up in academics, not my grades or the courses I’ve taken, but the community, peer-to-peer support, values of curiosity and questioning of authority, and the fostering of creativity and innovation.

And now? I’m ready to walk away.

One of my reoccurring nightmares is that I’m back in college to get a new degree, and I realize that I have quit my job and cannot afford to house myself. There’s always this moment of me being excited by the new prospect of learning and living in a new town. Sometimes I’m trying to find my classes, and other times I’m looking for an apartment. Then, BAM, realization: you’re broke, honey, and you’re never ever going to get that job back at the university.

Security and stability has ruled my life over the past decade. Learning to be responsible has made me a little fearful of failure. My anxiety is comforted by knowing exactly what’s expected of me and being able to meet that. The danger with this is that comfort can turn into stagnancy, to disengagement, to a mid-thirties identity crisis.

I’ve known for the past 2 years that my current career trajectory does not offer me any further growth. I started thinking about what I loved most about my job, and so much of it was part of my directing position in our writing center. It was the recruiting, training, mentoring, planning events and projects. I decided to pursue further education in Human Resources, so now I’m dipping a toe in the corporate waters. I’ve been applying and applying and applying. And? Nothing. One interview, I suppose. But it felt like a nothing.

There’s nothing more humbling than being a 10 year veteran professional and no one wanting you in for an interview.

Sometimes we can be mentally prepared for a change, and life just isn’t ready to move there yet. I’m learning to be patient. I’m trying to soften myself to my current career, lean back in where I find it meaningful, and avoid the real danger of quiet quitting.

It’s rough out here, y’all, but I’ll find my way.